Table 3 Women’s experience of stillbirth and parenting experiences of subsequent infant

The number of participants shared the experience

 1. It cannot be true – Baby with no heart beat

(Pregnancy with a dead baby; Confronted by a dead baby; Choice and information)

6

 2. Questioned Self & others

a. The off script experiences of others

6

b. Others failure to acknowledge the loss

6

c. Changed view of self – self is alone

5

 3. It cannot be true – Baby with a heart beat

(Consolation prize/Runners’ up prize)

6

 4. Surreal Experiences

(Joy and grief; Creating life like other women)

6

 5. Anxious parenting

(Unrealistic expectations from self; Creating memories)

5

 6. Integrating death in life

Self-growth

4

 1. Why

Is the self the culprit?

6

 2. Emotions

Anger and despair

5

 1. My baby existed after all

They are brothers/sisters; We are a family; He/she is still my child

6

 2. Betrayal

4

 3. Longing and need to be in touch

6